One more cup of coffee

Stupid people suck

Recently, I saw a bumper sticker that read "Your kid's an honor student, but you're a moron."

That was my day yesterday.

First we went to the SprintPCS store in Palo Alto, where Meredith wanted to look at the Handspring Treo 300. We had been down there once before to look at it, but this time we wanted to get it and figure out what we'd have to change our rate plan to. Unfortunately, things like rate plans seemed to frighten and confuse the sales rep we got stuck with. He looked up our existing rate plan and said, "These codes are so old, I don't even know what they mean. I've only been working here for six months. I guess you can call customer service." OK, well, do you at least have any of the Treos in stock? "Umm ... no, I think we're out." Well, that's good.

Next on our journey of idiocy, we went to the Apple Store in Palo Alto, with Meredith's dead iBook power adapter in hand. This, at least, seemed simple: exchange it for one that works. Hahahaha. First, we had to wait at the Genius Bar while the 'genius' helped other customers. Well, or something. He didn't actually appear to be helping anyone, but rather jumping back and forth between several different people that certainly didn't include us. Finally, after about 40 minutes, he asked what we wanted. "Well, are you sure it's the power adapter." Yes. "Have you tried another?" No. But he really wanted to see the iBook, so I retrieved it from the car, and brought it back. By now he was deeply involved in ... well, something. He was typing on his PowerBook a lot. I'm sure that was somehow helpful to something.

After another long wait, he said we should try the store power adapter on our iBook. It worked. Amazing. Now the genius decides that it must be our power adapter that is defective. Then he goes and starts doing something else again. After a while, he gets the idea to look and see if they have a replacement power adapter in stock. He then tells us that they don't have one for Meredith's model of iBook, but they might have one that will work anyway. Then he goes back to something else for a while, and, after another several minutes, he calls into the stock room and asks for someone to bring down the adapter.

Sure enough, that works. But that's not the end of it. First he has to prepare the paperwork for the exchange. Which he can't start, because he's busy doing something else again. For another ten minutes.

This was the point where I was having to work really hard to supress my homicidal tendencies.

Finally he finished, and we got to leave. But this, dear readers, was only half way through my day of idiocy. During the wait, I had called Fry's Electronics to see if they had the Treo in stock. That was a five minute phone call, during which I had to explain that the Treo wasn't a camera, nor an MP3 player, but was, in fact, a cell phone. No, not made by Nortel, by Handspring. s-p-r-i-n-g, not s-p-r-something-k. Oh, they do have it. Wonderful. They'll even hold it for us.

So after we finally left the Apple Store, we went to Fry's. After getting the attention of one of the twenty or so people sitting on their asses behind the registers, one of them decided it was worth the effort to get up out of the chair and go find the product. Even with that, it was probably the fastest trip to Fry's ever.

Only one more stop on the loony train: call Sprint PCS to have them activate the phone. You may recall an earlier experience of mine trying to call their customer service. First we tried to activate it online, but it said that we needed to call a phone number since I have a business account. So I called that number. "The number you have called is no longer in service." Hmm. Fine. Perhaps Sprint forgot to pay their phone bill?

So I call the regular number. Reach 'Claire, the virtual help desk representative'. Discover that Clarie has not, in fact, been programmed to recognize the phrase, "Oh, God, not Claire the virtual help bitch again!". Yell random things at Clarie until the computer gives up and connects me to a person. Or at least to the hold music for a person. After ten minutes, I reach someone who says I need to be transferred to the business center. Another ten minutes. Then I reach someone. He had instructions like, "Press the phone button on the right." "I don't see a phone button on the right." "No, there's a phone button on the right." "No, but I see a key on the left." "No, the right." "Is it an icon or a button?" "It's a button." "The phone button on the left?" "Yes, the button on the left." ARRGGGHHH!

The amazing part about all this, as Meredith points out, is that there are so many smart people these days out of work. So how do so many people like this still have jobs?

Posted by Mike at September 7, 2002 10:19 AM